Heyyyy there...
Coach Will here, cuz I just had to share a thought with you that has been, well, super impactful for me recently, in multiple realms. 'K here it is...
**"You can't find what you're not willing to look for."
That's it! So short, so simple...so true.
If anything, during this age when it feels like everyone is sharing allllllll the content, wisdom seems to pop out of the noise even more clearly.
Which is exactly how this quote feels each and every time I hear Sonya mention it (via her Instagram videos, various podcasts, or in her writing): wise.
It feels that way because it so clearly captures the not-so-comfortable sensation--as a White American cis-man--of realizing my own privilege within our heavily hierarchical society.
I can viscerally sense the ways in which, deep down, I may not want to accept the lived reality of so many of my fellow humans--daily doses of racism, sexism, gender-ism, able-ism, size-ism and xenophobia--because of what it says about me (and people who look like me).
How it uncovers what I don't WANT to see about myself.
And that realization is only a macro-version of a dynamic that permeates our lives....
The micro-version shows up in all the ways I have ignored nagging aches and pains in my body, or dismissed negatively charged interactions with the people I love, or, or...
And just as I am thankful for the gradual expansion in my understanding around the oppressive structures that under-gird our society (from the likes of Sonya, and many others), I am also deeply, if begrudgingly, grateful for other instances of painful realization:
realizing that my right hip wasn't going to just stop hurting on its own
realizing that my business--the Fitness Alchemists--wasn't going to become what I envisioned without getting clear on exactly why I do it
realizing that being honest is not the same as being nice
Sound familiar?
What Sonya is pointing at is a phenomenon that has been studied and discussed since (at least) the '60s: Cognitive Dissonance.
And all that research has shown that it a.) EXISTS, and b.) is almost impossible to notice in action, from the first-person perspective; it is a truly SUBconscious reflex that our mind engages when we're faced with identity-threatening information.
So the next time you have a chance for some Deep Thinking, when you're feeling safe and grounded, I encourage you to give some time to this question...
What am I resistant to, or unwilling, to look at in my life? And why?
Hope you're navigating the season ok--it's tough out there!
To your resilience,
Coach Will